Things with my new boyfriend are going great, until my friend Jordana Leigh comes over to borrow some shoes. She sees that Ive eaten a whole pizza, and she decides that Im not good enough for Brad, Im just too fat to date such a great guy. She knocks me out, ties me up and gags me, and then makes fun of me for being so fat, grabbing my chubby belly and proving her point. Obviously, hes too good for me, so she leaves me tied up and goes out on my date instead of me.
